Wednesday, June 30, 2010
I know I don't post much about him on here, does that make me a bad mommy? I hope not, I just usually need to write down how I'm feeling about certain things at a certain time, and the rest of my day is spent with him.
I guess this post is about him isn't it?
I have to say, that he is an awesome baby and I love him more than anything and would do anything to protect him.
He is named after Clark Gable, not Clark Kent, like everyone thinks, I was watching TMZ when they mentioned Clark Gable III, and I thought to myself, "Clark is a fantastic name". I put it on my list, and forgot about it for a little while. When we found out we were indeed having a boy, I went back to my list, saw the name Clark again, and said to myself "This name is not in the top 100, and it's a great name to grow up with". Andy agreed, and so we kept it a secret (except for a select few people) until the day he was born.
If I'm feeling sad or upset about something, I know I can count on his toothless smile to melt my heart.
He was an unexpected gift, but he was someone I looked forward to meeting, although I was terrified that I would be bad at mothering a child. Everyday I can't wait to see what new sound he will make, and I am lucky to be able to have a year off with him, just figuring him out, and getting to know how to calm him down.
I'm so proud of him when people tell me how strong he is, and I get a kick out of the people who tell me that he is so beautiful (and they always tell me that they mean it when they say it to me).
From the moment he was born, he made me tear up, he has the nicest eyelashes, and I adore his cute little nose. He looks just like his daddy (according to everyone), but so far, he still has my blue eyes. I enjoy breastfeeding him, especially when he makes it "goofy time" and starts looking at me and smiling and talking. Then I have to tell him "hasn't anyone ever told you not to speak with your mouth full"....that makes him smile more. His sleep suckling cracks me up every time, and the pouty bottom lip lets me know that "this isn't a serious crying session...yet".
His farting and burping abilities amaze me, and I can honestly say, they make me proud the louder they are (probably not so much when he's a teenager though).
He crys when he has to roll over from Belly to Back, and he is currently rolling side to side, but not yet back to belly.
I have purchased the Angel Care Monitor specifically for this instance and I am now terrified of when he might learn to roll over.
I wish I could snuggle him all the time, and I feel guilty if I leave him to cry for too long.
I try to make sure I tell him everyday that I love him, and hope he knows how much he means to me.
I make sure I cherish every moment with him, and have learned that I have to put him first, everything else can wait, he is my number 1 commitment, and I don't mind serving this life sentence.
So Clark, from your mommy, I want you to know I love you very much, and I hope someday, you love me enough to put me up in a good nursing home.